Talking about what happens, or frankly what doesn’t happen, in the bedroom can be overwhelming for many couples; but sexuality is an important part of maintaining a healthy relationship. Between kids, full time jobs, and the general stresses of life, it can be hard for couples to connect behind closed doors. With a limited or poor sex life, couples often find their relationships strained. The lack of intimacy can spill over into your daily conversations and actions, causing partners to become distant. If you feel stuck in this cycle, it may be time to see a sex therapist.
Just Like Any Other Therapy
Contrary to popular belief, sex therapy is just like any other form of therapy. There is nothing kinky or shameful about it. If you or your partner has erectile dysfunction, a low libido, or simply never feels in the mood, a sex therapist will offer a safe, comforting space for you to work through your problems. Sex therapy is not too different from your typical marriage and family counseling. It is usually a form a of psychotherapy that takes into account physical issues. Psychiatrists can help you break down the emotional issues that may be causing physical problems, such as erectile dysfunction. By getting to the root of the problem, a sex therapist can guide you to extinguish the major sexual issues you are facing.
Conversation is Key
When it comes to sexual health, many people are afraid to talk about their issues, even with their own partners. This is where a therapist can step in to help. If you are having sex with your partner but are still leaving unfulfilled, it is important you explain your emotional issues to your partner. This can be a difficult conversation to have, especially after years of marriage. A sex therapist can help you and your partner set up an open line of communication, so you can confidently discuss each others needs.
A sex therapist may also help you become more mindful and aware in the bedroom. After years of marriage, sex can seem like a chore, when in reality, it should be a sensual shared experience that connects you and your partner. Through mindfulness training, you will learn to become more present in the bedroom. Instead of worrying about your next project at work or what you will cook for dinner, a sex therapist will help you clear your mind, so you can focus on your partner. When mindfulness and open communication combine, your sexual relationship will flourish, and hopefully that success will bleed into other aspects of your shared life.
A sex therapist may also help you become more mindful and aware in the bedroom. After years of marriage, sex can seem like a chore, when in reality, it should be a sensual shared experience that connects you and your partner. Through mindfulness training, you will learn to become more present in the bedroom. Instead of worrying about your next project at work or what you will cook for dinner, a sex therapist will help you clear your mind, so you can focus on your partner. When mindfulness and open communication combine, your sexual relationship will flourish, and hopefully that success will bleed into other aspects of your shared life.
More Than Just Talking
When you decide to visit a sex therapist, their first step is typically to talk to you and your partner separately to pinpoint the major problems in your relationship. This is an important hurdle to jump over, because at the start, partners may feel insecure talking about their kinks, or lack thereof, in front of each other. Your therapists will also talk about your history. Were your parents close, have you ever been sexually assaulted or abused? These questions will help dig into your emotional walls. But don’t expect a sexual therapy session to just be a long talk about your feelings. Although it is important to break those barriers, once you have reached a comfortable emotional space, your therapist may start assigning you sexual homework.
Your therapist will not recommend a wild task, like getting involved in a threesome. Instead, they might have you sit in front of each other naked. It might seem silly, since you’ve probably seen each other naked over the years, but this time your therapist might suggest you really look at each other in your most vulnerable state. This will help connect you mentally and physically. Once you get over a small hurdle like this, your therapist may offer more sensual exercises, including light touching. The goal of these homework assignments are not to make you feel forced together, but rather to make you and your partner comfortable with each other. The end goal is these exercises should naturally lead to sex.
If you feel like your poor sex life is affecting your relationship, a sex therapist may be able to help you. These professional sessions will be a deep, emotional rollercoaster, but if you stick it out, a therapist may be able to save your marriage.
Your therapist will not recommend a wild task, like getting involved in a threesome. Instead, they might have you sit in front of each other naked. It might seem silly, since you’ve probably seen each other naked over the years, but this time your therapist might suggest you really look at each other in your most vulnerable state. This will help connect you mentally and physically. Once you get over a small hurdle like this, your therapist may offer more sensual exercises, including light touching. The goal of these homework assignments are not to make you feel forced together, but rather to make you and your partner comfortable with each other. The end goal is these exercises should naturally lead to sex.
If you feel like your poor sex life is affecting your relationship, a sex therapist may be able to help you. These professional sessions will be a deep, emotional rollercoaster, but if you stick it out, a therapist may be able to save your marriage.
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